I would like to tell you about an experience I had today. I thought that I would share it with you because I need to vent my anger somewhere. So here we go…
*shoves whole handful of Dorito’s into mouth*
On the way home today, I was walking with my friend Esme. She was telling me all about her drama assessment she is having soon. We were just minding our own business, when a gray haired woman in a bright orange coat started shouting at us. She said in a Scottish accent,
“Shut your filthy mouths! I thought it was some boys. Shame on you!”
You can imagine our shock. We were so shocked we only retaliated with a puzzled ‘huh?’.
There are many incorrect assumptions in what she said to us:
- We weren’t bloomin’ swearing!
- She said, “I thought it was some boys” when there were no boys on the street.
- Plus, what does that even mean? Only boys swear? We have low masculine voices? Or, “shame on you” because she assumed we were boys?
- And who goes up to someone and says that? I mean, who does that?
- Get yo’ facts straight lady!
I guess she was just in a bad mood, or maybe she had a bad hair day or she was mad (orange coats do often suggest insanity). Perhaps had really awful hearing so she thought when we were saying “So now my drama assessment has been delayed until next week!” We were actually saying “£**$%@ you *&%$*@ and @%$^&$£ so %&£@$!”.